You feel a sudden adrenaline rush on seeing someone, your heart seem to miss a beat when he smiles at you, and food and sleep have become a thing of the past. If you feel any of the above emotions, you will naturally reach the conclusion that you are in love.
But that might not be the case, because it could be something else too, like having a crush on someone or plain infatuation. Genuine love and infatuation are two different things but ironically have similar signs in the initial phases. In both cases, you always think about the person and your universe seems to be centered on him.
You make up reasons for being with them and the first thought in the morning is about this person and the last thought before you fall asleep is also about him. But of course, that is where the similarities end, because though a crush might develop into love later, love does not transform into a crush.
It might be difficult to distinguish between infatuation and genuine love, initially but as time goes, you will get to know the difference. But if you are currently in the throes of the sweet agony of love and losing your mind with the thoughts of your loved one, wouldn’t it be apt to first find out if you are really in love or if it is just a temporary crush? Here are some tips to spot the difference and also to help you to either come out or let an infatuation grow into the next phase.
You Are In Infatuation With The Idea Of A Person
This is one of the most significant differences between a feeling of crush and being in love. You will always be infatuated with this image that you have built of the person that you are interested in. You will only know a few things about this person and whatever you don’t know will be supplies by your imagination. You will start building perceptions about the nature of this person and start liking him for those mostly imaginary reasons.
Being in love is the complete opposite of that, here you would have already known the person’s qualities and there might be some that you don’t like but the feeling is so genuine and strong that you give yourself a chance. On the other hand when you discover that the object of your affection is actually much different than the picture you had painted, you start losing interest.
A Crush Phases Out
In case of a crush, you will only have the emotions till you have not had a chance to interact with the person too often. Once you get to know the person and find out that there actually might not be anything great about him, or you discover something that you don’t like about him, it will phase out.
Whereas, if it is genuine love the imperfections will be overshadowed by your feelings and you will decide to go the next step. One of the best ways to distinguish between infatuation and the genuine feeling is to get to know the object of your affection. You might discover that you are just in love with the feeling of being in love.
Real Love Is Realistic While Infatuation Is Imaginary
When you are infatuated or have a crush on someone, it will fade away the moment there is a sign of weakness or trouble in your crush. Crushes are based on decorated feelings and so they cannot stand any chance in front of reality.
But real love is all about accepting the situation and the person with all their failings and wanting to be with them through thick and thin. A crush only sees the positive in the relationship as well as the other person, while real love is aware about all the strengths and weaknesses of their love and learns to live with them.
You Are Not Your Genuine Self In Front Of Your Crush
When you have a crush, just as you cannot accept that your prince charming can have feet of clay, similarly you hate to expose any of your weaknesses in front of him. So, you end up pretending to be someone else in order to impress him. You are scared to show your true personality for the fear of being rejected.
On the other hand, in real love you will not be scared to be yourself and you will have the confidence and security to be your true self. So, if you are living in a world of make-believe, where both you and your partner are perfect beings, you might re-look at your relationship. It might be difficult to accept that you are not in love, but it is healthy to know it before it is too late.
Face The Facts
With all the above discussions, it might feel that infatuation and crushes are a child’s play and there is no hope for the feeling to grow. It is true to some extent, however if you are matured enough to face the reality and understand the emotions, you have the chance of going to the next step.
But for that to happen there are a few questions, you need to ask yourself. Are you ready to face a future with this person with all its harsh realities and with his shortcomings? Is he really the one, or were you just trying to avoid being lonely? Have you been with this person in all kind of environments or have you only met under the best of circumstances?
Do you bring out the best in each other or do you seem to only bring out the negatives? And lastly, are you both happy when you are with each other? Once you are able to answer these questions to your satisfaction, you will understand the difference between love and infatuation. And if you feel that there is no way that your infatuation can develop into real love, it is better for you to move on.
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