This is another of the dreaded question besides sorting out the different angles of man-woman relationships. Most women develop goose bumps at the thought of staying with husband’s parents after marriage.
In about 2 in 100 mother-in-laws are those who are tolerable, others are terrible, devilish and other such epithets accorded by the wives to the mother-in-laws.
The question is how to get out of bad situations without entering into other future conflicts. Here are some easy and really ‘possible’ solutions:
1. Anger Outbursts – never ever take out the anger (even if it is due to her) on the in-law because if she is not the understanding types, chances are that she will unleash on you more things that will be unbearable. Keep the anger in check and put a restraint on your feelings. Getting angry is not the solution; patience will help a lot. All the more better if the wife can sit and do a round table conference with the in-law.
2. Role Of The Husband – is he a mama’s boy or very neutral in his approach to the problems between the mother and you? The basic thing is he knows his parents very well than you can. If he understands towards his partner, probably he can help sort out the issues amicable by talking to his mother on your behalf. And if he gives the excuse of him being busy or too stressed, it is clear towards whom his leanings are.
3. Role Of Relatives – go for this only if the situations are not getting resolved. The relatives should be of the mother-in-law side and also should be emphatic towards you. Otherwise, all the problems will fall on deaf ears. Do not involve the siblings and your relatives. 99% of the time it ruins more. Also, don’t discuss the problems with outsiders, that is, the neighbors. Words spread like rapid fire and obviously nobody would want the personal things to go around. It will just corrupt the image of yours in the eyes of the mother-in-law.
4. Approaching The Counselor– that’s the last possible step if nothing else works out. But keep in mind both the parties must be willing to give a visit. It should not be forced.