Is your child shy
October 1, 2009
Children differ vastly in personality traits. Some are outgoing and friendly, while others are reserved and slow to warm up. These are innate qualities and considered to be normal.
It is important for parents to guide the children and draw them out of their shells. Here are some practical tips to help children overcome their shyness and boost self-esteem and self-confidence.
First, assess the child’s developmental age and check where the child stands at that particular stage of development. Once done, organize play dates with children of the same age.
This will provide opportunities for social interaction. It may be a good idea to restrict the playgroup size to help the child to open up, than a large group where the child can get overwhelmed.
Also, accept the shyness and accordingly set expectations for the child. There is no point in thrusting him/her into a larger group, where he/she may end up getting anxious.
Based on his/her nature, try to fix up one-on-one play dates for them to get acclimatized to a new social situation. Once they are good at handling this, progress to multiple children play-dates.
Lead by example. The child follows similar behavior patterns of the parent. Hence, use social interactions as opportunities to teach. The way you interact with strangers helps the child to understand how he/she needs to react.
Help them with conversation starters and egg the conversation along by prompting the child. The child can practice some basic questions and answers at home to feel more confident in a social set up.
Getting the child to answer questions with regard to his/her name, age and parents name etc, help him/her feel confident in the company of strangers.
Do not blame or scold the child for being shy. Understand that it is the innate nature. When he/she understands that there is no pressure to “perform” socially, he/she will be more willing to come out of the shell.
Do not “brand” the child as shy. This makes it difficult for the child to crawl out of this mode. It then appears that perhaps this is how it should be, to remain withdrawn at all times.
Treat kindly and gently, and coax him/her to speak and blossom. However, if the condition persists, and is making it difficult for the child, medical intervention may be required.
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