The preparation for a new one’s arrival is exciting and full of happiness, especially for the soon to become parents. Sometimes, during this charismatic journey called pregnancy, undesirable things happen and the loss of pregnancy can be one of the most undesirable ones.
Pregnancy loss and grief can create a range of emotions including denial, guilt, anger and even depression. Sometimes, it can take considerable time to realize the loss and the grieving stage may get extended. Physical healing can be a matter of a few days or months, but the emotional healing can take much more time.
If there are symptoms of clinical depression, like loss of interest in normal activities, lack of concentration, alterations in eating and sleeping habits, medical attention can be desirable. Here are some promising ways to help you overcome the pregnancy grief and loss.
Ways to Overcome Pregnancy Grief & Loss
Take Sufficient Time to Heal and Overcome the Trauma
Pregnancy loss and failure can happen with anyone; but it can be difficult for you to realize this fact (and accept the same). There are different stages which you can pass through before emerging successfully out of the grieving process. Accept your emotions but try not to get overwhelmed by them or behave in a judgmental way. There are some things beyond a human being’s control and better left to destiny.
Give yourself sufficient time to overcome the emotional setback. Set small targets when wanting to overcome the grief. Rely on days rather than weeks for easing and consoling yourself. Once you begin to cope up, you can expect to surpass the bad memories gradually. With passage of time, things shall change and improve.
Have a Strong Will and Determination
Do not spread the news to each and every one in your acquaintance. This can inculcate guilt and blame within you. You can talk to someone close and one who can understand your emotions and offer support, not sympathy. Sharing can relieve you of your sad emotions, and can give you ample opportunities to overcome the trauma. Don’t take anything personally or otherwise during this stage. Have faith that this stage shall pass because time and situation never remain the same for anyone.
Take A Break From Work Or the Schedule
If you are physically fit, you may want to change places for sometime so that a change in surrounding can favor overcoming the ordeal. A break from the routine can provide you more relaxation and healing opportunities.
You should also take sufficient rest and eat a healthy diet while recovering from pregnancy grief and loss. Never turn to alcohol or tobacco (or any other medication except the one prescribed by your doctor) as it can be damaging.
Avoid Expecting Too Much From Your Partner
As a woman, you can feel the loss more than your partner and be more expressive of your feelings. Your partner may not be depicting an avid expression but he certainly cares for you. He may have his own way of expression (different from yours), be more action-oriented and practical. He may even start working more to subside his feeling of loss.
Understand that men and women depict different expressions under the same situation which makes them complementary to each other. You may develop a bonding right from the day you get your pregnancy confirmed; your man may get the first feel only after seeing the ultrasound or the baby bump.
Memory and Mourning Can Be Relaxing
It is your own decision regarding keeping or winding up the memories of your unborn child (in the form of ultrasound report and images, baby clothes or anything you might have prepared or obtained in preparation for childbirth). Memories can be healing in various forms. Some women find it soothing to keep a journal while others may want to plant a tree or garden to honor their love for the unborn.
Personal memorial service can also help couples overcome the feel of loss. Hospitals may also provide memorial services for families who have suffered pregnancy loss. Perinatal bereavement programs are aimed at helping parents overcome the trauma.
Read Books Or Join A Support Group to Broaden Your Spectrum
There are good readings which can be done on the subject. Most women may be unaware of the causes of miscarriage (or other ways of losing pregnancy). Make yourself aware of your body and the underlying processes. There can be many reasons for losing a pregnancy, both natural and accidental. Understanding the reason behind pregnancy loss can help you overcome the situation in a better way. This can also help you prepare better for another pregnancy, besides taking care of your apprehensions regarding another one.
Reach out to the world and connect to many others who have undergone a similar phase and trauma. There are several online forums and support groups which can be approached for meeting like-minded people. This facilitates sharing and exploring the real world to enable optimism in life. Nothing is ultimate expect the almighty and humans are born to err.