How to Handle an Ex
March 19, 2009
The familiar support has been switched off, broken off, and completely turned off. From the time you broke up with your girlfriend and the distance has set in, in your heart and in your mind, it’s difficult to woo it back. If you happen to be working in the same office, then it is going to be a bit sticky and you have to be able to avoid bumping into her, or be besieged with memories and sentiments. Be diplomatic and avoid any references of what has happened between the two of you before. Stay cool and congenial so that she gets the message that you do not want to revive the relationship and that it is over. Or, if you find it difficult, just read this article for some really good tips on how to handle an ex.
Be a little ruthless and discard all mementos of a past relationship; that is, if you really want to. Stay away from your ex and tell her outright that you do not think that things are going to work out between you both again. Be explicit in your explanation as to why you do not to want to carry on as before. Do not try to revive the relationship once you have made up your mind. If you try to flirt or say something that is meaningful, then she would think that you want her back and this would make things worse. Do not get involved with anyone else on the rebound, as you need time and space to heal. But if you are sure that this is the only way to make her stay away from you, you can date someone.
Tell your friends that you are not seeing your ex anymore. This would be relayed to her also, and she will know for sure that it’s over. Do not try the soft approach, which invites intimacy with her and which again sends off the wrong vibes. Most people sleep with their ex-girlfriends for some reason or the other and find it difficult to sort out their lives. Get into the friends mode and, if you must talk to her, then go on to general topics with nothing that smells of romance or the passion you once shared. If your ex wants to go forward with the relationship again, be firm and tell her that it would not work as you have tried it out many times and now the time has come when a change is good for you both.
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