How To Deal With Gossip
July 19, 2008
Most everyone has been the subject of gossip at some point or the other in their lives and has felt the hurt and humiliation that goes along with it. On the other hand, we have also indulged in gossip sessions and have made someone or the other a gossip victim, injured their feelings and lowered them in the eyes of others. How to deal with gossip is a million dollar question that plagues those who have been mercilessly gossiped about.
The best way to deal with gossip mongers is to tell them upfront that what they are doing is hurtful, and you refuse to participate in such sessions. Or, why not simply change the subject. If, you feel uncomfortable asking your boss, co-worker or close friend to stop gossiping, change the subject so you don’t have to participate in an unsavoury gossip session, whose only outcome is that someone will end up with hurt feelings.
Another way to prevent gossip is to be careful what you do and say around others, especially around those who have a tendency to gossip. It may not be fun to censor yourself, but at least you aren’t providing any new material or gossip for fodder for people who love to gossip and spread rumours.
As well, you would be wise to entrust your secrets to tried and tested friends, who won’t be interested in making your business the business of all the town. If, asking the gossip mongers hasn’t stopped them from gossiping and they haven’t obliged, just let it go. Move on and you will find that they will eventually get bored and move on as well.
Certain gossip is forgotten in a week, while other gossip can last for a lifetime, but nearly all gossip is destructive. Gossip can wreck friendships and relationships, create problems at work or at school, put pressure on what you do or the choices you make. Gossip hurts feelings, can create a bad self-image, even lead to depression. Gossip affects everything.
Always remember gossip hurts, so try to ignore any gossip you may happen to hear about someone else, but don’t spread it any further. Ask them to refrain from gossiping, instead of joining in. Correct them if you know the truth as long as it doesn’t have an adverse effect. Keep your mouth shut if you hear anything interesting, and which may prove damaging to the person to whom the information relates. Put yourself in their shoes, while remembering a simple rule …… ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all!
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