Do Men Value Virginity?
June 21, 2008
Whereas, in times past, men valued virginity in a woman, things have changed and so have the concepts about virginity. However, a difficult subject it carries great social and historical resonance. For centuries and more, women have been dominated by men, accorded a lower status, treated as mere chattels of men. Who could imagine that a time would come when women could indulge in premarital affairs with impunity, an active sexual life outside of marriage, have a sexual life even when they had a family life?
So, how did virginity come to be valued? It was probably at the time when they were not permitted access to their own bodies. It is then that virginity became a symbol of their submission and a value was placed on it. It was the advent of organised religion that provided a philosophical rationale for men’s views about virginity. It led them to treasure the concept of virginity in their wives, sisters and daughters, although they did not value it for themselves. The three religions of the book i.e. Judaism, Christianity and Islam taught that women were essentially evil, tainted by the Original Sin and could behave in a lustful manner, leading them to lose their virginity. It was the clerics of these religions that began to equate virgin with pure, and a virgin woman with a pure woman.
In Christianity, the early Church looked at women and marriage as necessary evils, while Islam went further by saying that women who drove cars were immodest, as were those who wore short sleeves, complained about male dominance in public or demanded a divorce from wayward husbands. As for unmarried non-virgins, even stoning was too good for them.
So, do men continue to value virginity even today? Not a black and white question, as in religious terms modern society values virginity highly. Whereas, in non-religious terms and the modern Western world, a lower value is placed on virginity and if a woman is still a virgin at 25, she might be suspected of suffering from a serious personality disorder.
However, more traditional Middle Eastern societies value virginity in women and it is still highly prized by men. These men prefer their brides to be virgins for exactly the same reasons they want the women of their families to dress modestly. It is because they want to re-affirm their dominance over women.
So what is the value of virginity? Not a great deal, as men in the West prefer to steer clear of virgins and parents hope that their children will play the field, gain experience and then settle down with a partner of their choice. It is the East, which still hankers after and places a high value on virginity. So much so, that young girls and women who have lost it are resorting to restoring their hymens with hymenoplasty!
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