Dealing with your Teenage Daughter
May 19, 2009
Teenage children are difficult to deal with. Parents need to remember back to their own teenage years and remember that these children are going through the most difficult phase of their lives; this is especially true of girls. You have to be patient with your teenage daughter while she is coping with many changes, physically, mentally and emotionally.
It is advised that you revamp your relationship and the methods you have employed in the past to deal with your daughter. You should not approach her as a parent or a guardian.
It is better to relate to her as a friend and advisor. Build strong bonds with her; be her friend so that she depends on you for validation and support. With this attitude you will win her over and with your love and support she will be able to deal well with this difficult period in her life.
Talk to her
Always be approachable and positive. She must know that she can talk to you about anything. This will bridge the gap between parent and child. She may go through phases where she hates everyone or feels misunderstood; the next day she might be absolutely okay.
These are mood swings that all teenage girls go through. If she feels you are her friend, she will come to you and talk freely, and you can give her the love and support she needs. That will lessen her angst.
Love her unconditionally
You love her dearly, but it is important that you show these emotions. Show your concern and do not be judgmental. At times she may make silly mistakes. Talk to her and show her where she went wrong. Once she has realized her mistake, let it go. Do not nag or try to control her. That will make her rebellious.
Be patient
Remember, your daughter is most important to you, not the rules. If she is willful or has been rebellious, deal with the situation with firmness and patience. All teenagers go through these phases.
Spend quality time with her and discuss her life. As her confidant you can guide her. As a parent, you will not be able to. Once you are her confidant, you will be the first person she approaches when she needs to make a decision.
Discuss sex
Yes, it is embarrassing and it is awkward. But you have to discuss it. While virginity is not a perquisite for the younger generation, there are other issues related to sex that are of the utmost importance. Your daughter needs to be careful with her sexuality.
Indiscriminate sexual behavior can lead her into situations that are awkward and humiliating. She needs to know what is acceptable and what is not when it come to sexual intimacy with a boy. Remaining a virgin has advantages, and it is a safer option.
Give her space
Now that you have gained your daughter’s trust and become her friend, do not ruin it by interfering. She needs to be given space. Be non-intrusive, casual and friendly. A perfectly balanced approach would be to give her space but not complete freedom. This will ensure that she has a balanced lifestyle.
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