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A Promise Is Keeping Your Word

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July 22, 2008

A man, without his word, is nothing.  No doubt, one has heard this expression often enough, however, we give it little thought.  Perhaps, you should if you give a damn about being anything in this life.  As everyone knows promises are to be broken but kept!

As far as I am concerned, keeping your word is a given, unless you want to be sleep with the fishes.  How quickly one learns to be unspecific about delivering what we know we may not be able to, whether it’s promising to pay back borrowed money, or keeping a secret secret , or promising a return favour without following through on it.

Not keeping your word or a promise made is not unique just in the business world, but also in your personal life, where the same rules must apply.  In the corporate world, one should never get into a situation where one let’s someone down.  That is because you should never promise what you can’t deliver in the first place.  Keeping your word in the business world, just as you keep business cards, is extremely important as one is running a business not a charity.

When it comes to keeping your promises, don’t mince words or try to wriggle out of what you said you would do.  You know, forget about word games like “I don’t know, maybe, I’ll find out, we’ll see.” etc.  More than likely, you may just end up seeing someone’s fist.  The same principle applies when making a promise.  An “I promise”, “you have my word,” “it’s a done deal”, all mean you have promised and you should keep to your word.

Only someone very stupid will give his word or promise something that is out of his control.  Because, promising something you know is not possible means, you will end up lying to save face.  Already too late, you will lose the respect of the person you have let down, you will rate lower in his esteem, as it becomes clear that your word or promise means nothing.  It takes a lifetime to earn the respect and trust of others and it takes only one stupid move to lose it.

Keeping your word is especially important if as a parent you have given it to your child.  By doing so, you have created an expectation in your child that what you promise, you will deliver.  If, you don’t keep your word, then you are just patterning them for disappointment.  The blame and anger will quickly escalate at the slightest provocation, with no control.  Rather than create expected disappointment, try to create expected fulfilment.

Once you make this commitment to keep your word.  If, you say you’ll read your child a story, do it.  If, you say you’ll go for a walk, go for one.  If, you say you’ll fix the bike, fix it.
When we keep our word to our children, they learn the value of trust and how important it is to keep a promise.  As well, there will be fewer tantrums, less manipulative behaviour and less frustration; instead, we will see greater tolerance.  When we keep our word, our children learn to relax, they know they are being told the truth and it builds their faith in us, which enables relaxation, patience and self-control.

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