A Perfect Apology-How To Say Sorry
July 19, 2008
All relationships have their highs and their low. One day you get along like a house on fire, the next you fight and can’t stand the sight of each other. Not a pleasant situation and one that calls for one of you to apologise, say sorry which is never easy. Tough as saying sorry is, it is the only effective way to resolve the issue and make-up after the fight.
Begin your apology by giving a detailed account of your offence, to ensure you are talking about the same thing. Recounting the offence by the offender helps to legitimise the feelings of the recipient of the apology. Be specific by focusing on the actual event, don’t go apologising for being absent minded when you have missed an important date. Acknowledge and validate the hurt or damage caused to the recipient’s feelings when saying sorry.
Don’t make excuses for your role in offending, take responsibility and make it clear that you did not intend your actions to cause harm. Forget defending or justifying your actions, it hardly counts if they were unintentional as the end result is the same. Instead, focus on making a perfect apology. When saying sorry, ensure you promise not to make the same mistake again. By apologising you are rebuilding your relationship, and there is no value in apologizing for an offence that may get repeated.
Finally, ask for forgiveness at the end of your apology and give the power back to the recipient. This lets them know you have done all that you can by apologizing and providing restitution. Leave the next move up to them. Follow the above and the next time you have to say sorry, you can be sure your apology will be accepted with no hard feelings. You have learnt how to render a perfect apology!
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